Instructions for Romney on How to Debate Obama Octopus

Then the creeping murderer, the octopus, steals out, slowly, softly, moving like a gray mist, pretending now to be a weed, now a rock, now a lump of decaying meat while its evil goat eyes watch coldly. It oozes and flows towards a feeding crab, and as it comes close its yellow eyes burn and its body turns rosey with the pulsing color of anticipation and rage. Then suddenly it runs lightly on the tips of its arms, as ferociously as a charging cat. It leaps savagely on the crab, there is a puff of black fluid, and the struggling mass is obscured a sepia cloud while the octopus murders the crab.

John Steinbeck (1902-1968), Cannery Row

Adopt the character of the twisting octopus, which takes on the appearance of a nearby rock. Now follow in this direction, now turn a different hue.

Theognis (fl.c 545 BC), Elegies

October 3, 2012 – Governor Romney, in your debate tonight with President Obama, think of Obama as a octopus.  Octopus is a metaphor for tentacles of big government.   An octopus means different things to different people at different times. An octopus can move in eight different directions at the same time. His tentacles reach everywhere and have touched everyone, feeding some, devouring others.

Obama is adaptable. He will make variations and adjustments, small and large, to survive and thrive in this debate. He is a cool character.  As a debater, Obama has camouflage, keen problem-solving skills, shape-shifting abilities, strong tentacles, an ink cloud to distract and hide his movements, a strong jaw, and in some cases, a glib and poisonous tongue. He has redundant offensive and defensive systems all working a little differently from one another.

President Obama will be difficult to debate. Should health care come up, he will squirt ink about the favorite Obamacare features  – coverage for pre-existing disease, young adults up to 26 under their parents’ policies, limits of coverage, donut hole discounts, 15% limits on health plan profits compared to revenues.

It will not be wise to attack these popular features. The GOP might even want to keep them while repealing most of the bill. It will be difficult to counter the camouflage language at which President Obama is so adept and which the mainstream media so eager to swallow.

Beyond these problems, you will require a comprehensive counter strategy that shows you have commonsensical solutions to the myriad problems of our health system.

Keep it simple. It's about the will of the people, not the size of government.  

Remember: A comprehensive offense is the best defense, just don’t be offensive.

Above all, don't be a crab.

Tweet: The Obama octopus will be difficult to debate because of its adaptability, survival skills, and political reach.